Louvre Heist: The Italian Job but French and Somehow Dumber Yet More Successful

How to Steal Napoleon's Wife's Jewelry on a Vespa Scooter

You know how heist movies always have that moment where the plan sounds so stupid it might actually work? Where the crew sits around a table and someone pitches robbing Fort Knox during a presidential visit and everyone laughs until they realize he’s serious?

That happened.

In real life.

At the damn Louvre.

Four guys walked into the most famous museum on Earth at 9:30 in the morning, smashed their way into the Apollo Gallery, stole nine pieces of French crown jewels worth more money than exists in several small economies, and drove away on Vespas. The whole thing took seven minutes. Nobody got hurt. Nobody got caught. Somewhere in Paris right now, someone’s sitting on Napoleon’s wife’s emerald necklace wondering if they should feel bad about it.

Spoiler: they probably don’t.

The Setup That Shouldn’t Exist

Let’s establish something first. The Louvre isn’t some corner bodega where the security camera’s been broken since 2003. This is the most visited museum in the world. Eight point seven mi…